Everyone always casts Derek as the Rosa in a brooklyn nine nine recasting which OFTEN WORKS I KNOW but eeames raised the possibility of a DEREK AS BOYLE life and now I’m fully dying over it. YOU’VE GONE FULL BOYLE.
Imagine a world where Derek was totally bouts to propose to Jennifer when she turned out to be a SCARY MEAN DRUID. Derek is constantly driving people away because they think they’re getting a one night stand with a hotness monster and instead Derek rolls over in the morning and is like, do you think we should hyphenate? No, I’ll change mine. That’s fine, I won’t mind. I wonder if City Hall has Saturday hours.
"I don’t do that," Derek says, frowning, when Scott calls him on it.
"You declared us wolf brothers, like five minutes after we met," Scott says. "It was real weird."
When Derek and Stiles end up hooking up, Stiles braces himself. He has tons of possible speeches prepared, about how he’s not ruling out anything, but he wants to go slow, he has to finish out college, it’s nothing against Derek but—”
Only Derek doesn’t say anything. ”Okay,” he says, when Stiles has to cancel last second. ”You’ve got time to decide,” he says, when Stiles talks about maybe studying abroad. He puts on reruns of Seinfeld when he’s bored and clicking, when Stiles knows a Derek Hale signature move is to casually turn on Say Yes to the Dress, and try to suss out whether his partner wants a big fancy wedding or not.
"You’re not even ready to get married," Scott says, when Stiles says something.
"I know," Stiles explodes. "But I’m not even worthy of his weird obsession with honeymoon shopping? God, he probably doesn’t even like me that much, I’m probably temporary, I’m not even in his CRAZY DREAM FUTURE.”
Scott sighs, points to the hall closet, says, “Top shelf.”
Inside is a fancy scrapbook. Derek has pasted Stiles’s head on an entire range of different suits and tuxedos, rated them on a scale of 5 possible chili peppers.
"Thank God," Stiles breathes, sagging in relief as he gets to a carefully handwritten list of possible names for their firstborn.
UNHOLY SCREECHING"It comes second overall in taste, taking into account crust consistency and sauce temperature, but only fourth in mouthfeel!"
Scott McCall is what powers the sun! Scott McCall is what kitten whiskers are made from. When flowers bloom its because Scott McCall is near. Derek Hale (via captain-snark)